Tuesday, November 4, 2025

Cauldron Con AAR: Day 3 & Final Thoughts

Hello Blogland. The spine-tingling conclusion to my European adventure at Cauldron Con is here!!


DAY 3

I awoke feeling not too worse for wear considering my misadventures the previous night (see Part 2). Coffee was in short supply but I cadged a half-cup, ate some food and got ready for...


The Awards

Speeches! Settembrini mentioned every DM who ran a game (hurrah to all of you!), the volunteers who tirelessly put in their own time to make it happen, the people who spent money at the auction, and the bold players who came from around the world to game!

The Blackrazor Cup Champions

1st place: some group with 390,000 gold pieces collected!!!
2nd: 235,000 gp or so
3rd: our group, 220,000 gp!


The author leaps into the photo with the other bronze medalists, just in time.


GusB was wrong, we did not get first place. Nevertheless it was a close competition (except for 1st place, who knows what kind of loot they found) and well played by everyone - just wait until next year! Medals were handed out, pictures taken, and so much clapping that my hands started to hurt.

After this event the games filled up fast, but I managed to get myself...


***

Into The Cellars

DM: Grutzi

Players:
Me - Sven, Swedish vagabond
Chris - Charlie, English vagabond
Hynek - Ignatius, Czech student
Dominico - Mikael, Czech sharpshooter
Markus - Brother Frederico - Italian priest
Jay - Kryztof - Polish duelist


A Helvéczia adventure, the only one of the convention! Grutzi was fairly new to the system but I had run it once before (see my report on The Seven Knaves a while ago). He handled the system adeptly and of course is a veteran DM, so along with some other experienced players we had no problems in that department.

At a party hosted by robber baron-turned-gentleman Alveraten Perzholt [did I spell this right?], the guests received a chilling surprise: at the stroke of midnight all doors and windows of the manor house slammed shut, trapping everyone inside. A statue of the Archangel Michael spoke to the guests in a frightening voice, proclaiming that when the sun rose, the souls of all within would be forfeit to the Devil! The statue invited anyone wishing to change this outcome to venture below and negotiate a better outcome for themselves.

Six of the guests were chosen to sort out this issue. This motley group (us) took the servants' stairs and entered the manor's cellars...

We found a kitchen staffed by dancing devils, helpfully exorcised by Brother Frederico. After they disappeared, a fire in the stove began to grow larger and hotter, giving us the impression that something was coming. We made our exit quickly at that point and heard a fiendish voice after we closed the door. Better not to get involved in that!

Progressing further, we came to a large cistern with a group of patrolling skeletons. We had decided not to use our guns for fear of letting our hosts know we were coming, so we took the undead by surprise, pushing them into a pool of water where they were attacked by giant lampreys. Mikael, not having any weapon besides his carbine, knocked one on the head with a perfectly-aimed loaf of bread!

We avoided several hallways crowded with gargoyle statues, assuming they would come to life and attack. Following the distant sound of music, we came to a large mirrored hall filled with dancing ghosts. A skeleton band at one end played endless waltzes while at the other end was a large door. Alright, clearly something would happen if we entered but what? We checked out a dressing-room nearby and appropriated the finery for ourselves in the hopes of blending in. Meanwhile, Kryztof found a secret door leading to a strange room with a preserved human hand holding a diamond the size of a marble! Pocketing this strange item and treasure, we entered the ballroom.

Some of us danced well, making it across the room without a problem. Others clumsily bumped into the ghosts and were damaged by the icy cold of the grave. Nevertheless we all made it through eventually.

On the other side of the ballroom the corridors beneath the manor continued and we weren't sure which way to go next. Ignatius summoned a small imp to scout the possibilities [good move] and it reported to us: northwards was a sitting-room inhabited by a cinderman [a type of demon that eats flames]. To the south were some stairs, a fountain and a chapel. We elected to avoid the demon for now in the hope that Brother Frederico would benefit from a visit to the chapel, perhaps gaining new spells.

On the way to the chapel we spotted a secret door. As it turned out, the mirrors in the ballroom were one-way! We found ourselves circling the ballroom in some kind of spy tunnels. They led to an artists' studio behind the bandstand. From this vantage point we could see that just on the other side of the mirrors, behind the skeletal band, a pedestal rested with a suit of glowing chainmail on it. But how to get it without breaking the glass, alerting the skeletons and getting into a big fight? We would likely win but it was getting late and we didn't want to spend too much time on it.

I forget whose idea it was [Dominico's I think] to use the preserved hand holding the diamond to cut a hole in the mirror and pilfer the chainmail. Unfortunately for us, the cut out piece fell and broke, alerting the skeletal band! We grabbed the armour and ran through the secret tunnels, closing the doors behind us.

We moved on to the chapel where Brother Frederico preached a sermon to a congregation of ghosts, banishing them to their final rest and opening up a secret stairwell downwards. The group descended and found themselves confronted with three doors: one with a clenched fist, another with a pair of dice, and the third with praying hands. We decided to split up and tackle all three doors separately.

Ignatius and Brother Frederico tried the door with praying hands, the Test of Faith. It led to a simple hallway lined with statues. As they progressed, their virtue was tested more and more severely. Any time they failed, a holy fire scorched them! They made it to the end, but with almost no hit points left.

Charlie and Sven tried the door with a pair of dice, the Test of Luck, and found a room holding only a table with a deck of cards. Charlie boldly drew one first and not even his scoundrel's luck could save him from the result: DEATH! [This was harsh, but funny.] Sven got luckier, drawing a card which materialized a key in his pocket for the exit. He looted poor Charlie's pistol and shot and moved on.

Mikael and Kryztof tried the door with the fist, the Test of Might, and were embroiled in a battle to the death with an animated suit of armour! At this point it seemed the time for subtlety had departed, so Mikael started blasting with his carbine while the Italian swordsman fought two-weapon style. In a close match, the construct was defeated and the door opened.

Someone: "So we're switching to guns now?"
Dominico: "I'm out of bread!"

We all emerged from the same door on the other side, reunited by the mysterious forces that had created these tests.

Rest of group: "Where's Charlie? Hey... is that his gun??"
Me: "Uhmmmm..."

Descending the final set of stairs, we came to a room with a great banquet set up. Our host, Alverofen Perzholt was seated at the table while a horned demon stood talking to him. This was it!

The demon introduced himself as Nabigolo and invited our group to sit, explaining the situation: Perzholt had offered his soul to Nabigolo in a bargain many years ago in return for worldly wealth and success, but now the bill had come due. Not inclined to part with it yet, he had devised an alternate plan: hold a party and trap a whole group of other souls for Nabilgolo in exchange for his own. At this point the demon offered us wealth, success, and most importantly escape from the manor if we would sell our souls to him individually.

Well, the solution to the problem was a simple one and good work that Ignatius noticed it! Suffice it to say that Alverofen Perzholt got what was coming to him while the party guests escaped into the bright light of day.

This was a really good adventure and the whole group played well, made quick decisions, and were just fun guys to sit at the table with. Grutzi wrote this adventure himself, and I must say I think he nailed the particular tone of this game perfectly, not an easy thing to do! I hope he releases it for the other Helvéczia GMs out there.


***

And that was the last adventure of the convention! The weekend had come to an end and with heavy hearts we packed our bags, cleaned our rooms and drove home through the windmill-haunted hills of Deutschland.


SCORES

Games Run: 2
Players: 12
Characters: 13
PC Kills: 0/13
PC Transfigurations: 1/13
Player Wins: 2/2

Games Played: 3
Character Deaths: 0
Wins: 3/3
Technical Knockouts: 1


FINAL THOUGHTS

I am not much of an orator, so let's keep this short:

What a tremendous experience, especially for a first convention. Everybody was friendly and there to play the game. I met cool new people and had the chance to put faces to plenty of names I've interacted with or seen online over the years.

Playing adventures together (especially the challenge modules like the Blackrazor Cup or Assault on the Beckerdrome) brought out the TRVE GAMER SPIRIT of competition, a friendly battle for high scores with everyone showing up to win and playing their best. Players were focused (98% of the time anyway) on kicking ass, getting treasure and achieving victory. It's amazing what you can get done in a 4-hour game session with that mentality! The rest of the fun was laughing with other players and DMs over dinner or comparing notes with another group that had played the same adventure. There were so many great games that even showing up at the back of the signup line, you were definitely going to play in something cool.

The con is run by volunteers (including Settembrini's family!) for a small audience, and this really shows. The whole weekend had a family & friends atmosphere which was absorbing even for a foreigner who can't speak the language and knew almost nobody. People you had never met, had never gamed with, but had only passed on the way to get a beer would engage you in conversation over dinner and wish you a fond goodbye when you departed on the last day.

It was great to have such a shared experience, united by what would seem such a small and simple thing we all do - playing D&D!

10 out of 10, incredible weekend. I'll see you all next year!


***

Well blogland, that was a roller-coaster ride, wasn't it? 
Stay tuned later this week for an after-action megapost about Gilded Dream of the Incandescent Queen!


Sunday, October 26, 2025

Cauldron Con AAR: Day 2

Greetings again blogland! Cauldron Con was so awesome that a full report could not be contained in one post. Read on for...


DAY 2

Waking up early, I frantically cleaned up my pregen character sheets to return them to factory settings, since I only brought one set for the two games! [Apologies to those who wanted to keep their sheets from the first game, this is a mistake I won't make again.]

With everything in place, I hunted down some coffee and got into character. After the previous day's session I knew I would be fine, so we dove right in to...


***

Saturday Block I
Gilded Dream of the Incandescent Queen


DM: Me

Players:

Premier - Edward the Scissorhands II, fighter 5 and his henchman Wigmund & John Magic II, M-U 5
Chomy - Arok II, ranger 5 & Torglol, elf fighter 4/M-U 4
Bexter - Berwick II, cleric 5 
Der Oger - Wicked Joe, assassin 5
Vorpal Mace - John Magic II, M-U 5 (late arrival, Premier handed off one character at this point)

With a smaller group, I let a few players bring an extra character to bring the total PCs up to six.

I gave the group the same preamble (see Part 1) and we were off!

The party checked out the Meeting Room briefly and scooped up a few pieces of treasure, then moved across to the Hall of Primaries. They ducked past a few glowing butterflies and examined the objects in the room briefly, but couldn't come up with a plan to open the sealed door. They decided to move on quickly [smart move in a time-limited convention game!].

They progressed through the long hall and turned a group of skeletons who fled the sanctum and were destroyed by a massive lightning strike on the balcony [a lucky roll!]. The same lightning frightened a pack of glowing butterflies, leaving the way clear. The group turned the skeletons lurking in the Room of Night, and found an invitation on an adventurer's corpse.

In a departure from the previous group's play, the party returned to the entry room and showed their invitation to the butlers. The helpful servants brought the party upstairs to the Trophy Room, explaining that the Queen was further above but they were not permitted to enter. The group also asked the butlers many questions about the sanctum, learning about the queen's alchemist (who works in the basement) and the general of her armies (not seen for many years).

Opening the gold & silver doors to the grand throne room, the group carefully approached the apparently-dead queen in formation. Berwick II got close enough to breathe in her poisonous aura. I forget what exactly they did to disturb her but the undead monarch woke up, and the fight was on! The witch-queen gave a better account of herself this time [casting Invisibility on the first round, then summoning more skeletons] but between a Fireball from John Magic II, a few tense melee rounds for Wicked Joe and Arok II, Silence 15' Radius from Berwick II, and well-timed use of a Potion of Flying by Edward to fly outside the arena and attack from the rear, the queen was slain and her treasure [what wasn't melted by the Fireball] looted!

With this victory achieved early, the group investigated the throne room. Berwick II stepped upon the golden stairs and failed 2 saving throws! His spirit was split into pure good (ascending to the sun, never to return) and pure evil (a 1 HD skeleton, easily destroyed by Edward). Before he vanished into the rapturous heavens, Berwick II's player was allowed one question, which the DM had to answer with perfect truth:

Bexter, without hesitation: "What is the alchemist's stat block?"
Me: "HEY, have you read this adventure or what?!?"

After assuring me he hadn't, I explained that this was an excellent question: I opened the OSRIC book to the Glabrezu entry and the players decided they would be mighty careful dealing with the queen's alchemist!

Around this point, Vorpal Mace showed up and somebody passed him a character sheet. Bexter was handed Arok II to replace the departed Berwick II, and we were back in action.

Using the gold sun key they took from the queen, the party bluffed their way past a few talking statues and took the stairs all the way to the basement. They were accosted by an old man behind bars, begging to be freed - the queen's alchemist! They scammed him out of a bit of gold but had no intention of setting the demon loose.

Exploring the prison using the Queen's Key, they discovered a room with a puddle of mercury that took the form of a knight, electing to seal the door shut when it made an aggressive move. They rescued an old monk named Ernas who had been trapped by the queen for many years and made immortal by his trip up the golden stairs.

Around that point we were running out of time, and luckily for the group they had Ernas with them and he knew the password to the teleporter!

Great and tight play by these guys, especially in the battle with the queen. They saw a different slice of the dungeon than any other group and were the only players to try out the stairs or make their way into the basement!

[Full breakdown of treasure, etc. in its own post later!]


With another successful delve, we turned our attention to lunch. More laughs were had around the tables, folks regaling us with thrills & spills of their games. GusB was convinced that our group had secured the Blackrazor Cup in our game the day before, especially after hearing about the disastrous run Prince and Parti had (they went into the pit of wights, dear god!). I was fairly confident, but prepared for a surprise (wait for Part 3).

I reached the signup sheets near the back of the line and saw that most games were full already! Then I espied an adventure that looked very cool, and signed up for...


***

Saturday Block II
Caul's Dark Citadel

DM: Jonathan Becker


Players:
(sorry, I didn't write down everyone's characters!)
Me - Sheila, thief 6/cleric 6
Doof - magic-user
Theo - fighter I think
Michael S.
Martin
Hening
Grutzi - cleric 5


I saw that Becker had run Anthony Huso's adventure The Silver Temple of Transcendent Flame the previous day, so I had my suspicions about what would happen. I was not disappointed!

The antipaladin Caul, Flayer of Men (a villain from Huso's original Esoteric Order of the Twilight Princess home campaign) had kidnapped the Divine Child, and was holding it in his evil castle. Our job was to break in, steal the child back and escape!

As a diehard Huso fan, I was obviously all-in for this. Having read and immersed myself in the original play reports, this felt like having a chance to go back and fight Darth Vader before the first Star Wars movie!

Our characters were Becker's interpretation of the cast of the '80s D&D cartoon, now all grown up. This was a bit odd, since Huso's adventures are usually pretty dark - it seemed like a tonal mismatch. Having no knowledge of the cartoon myself, I grabbed the first sheet that said 'cleric' on it, and got a dual-classed thief/cleric with Boots of Elvenkind and - a Cloak of Invisibility? Now we're talking!

Sheila turned out to be sick as hell. Her invisibility cloak had unlimited uses, so I spent my time way out in front of the group, scouting out the situation invisibly. Many backstabs were dealt out, and much advance warning gained about upcoming problems in the dungeon.

Sheila climbed up to the top tower of the fortress and let a rope down. A single half-elf was lurking, and once the group got his attention a tense confrontation began. As soon as he reached for an item, it was backstabbing time! He turned out to be a tough cookie (an assassin with a Potion of Speed throwing 6 poisoned darts in one round, luckily we all made our saves) but soon he surrendered and we pumped him for information about Caul, his associates and underlings (including a drow witch), and some kind of "giant mutant crustaceans." Hmm...

Mapping this place turned out to be a real problem. Caul's fortress had clearly been constructed with infernal assistance - hallways and stairs looped up and down over each other with no rhyme or reason. Every NPC we asked about the fortress would respond "well, this place is kind of strange..." until Becker was, with a grin, repeating the line to a chorus of groans from the players! 

[The only complaint I have about this group is that we spent too much time talking to NPCs. I understand the impulse to make sense of a strange area - after all information is power - but there comes a point when the most useful details have been extracted and it's time to move on.]

The group wandered the twisting halls of Caul's citadel. I tried to use Locate Object to find the drow witch's sanctum, but it did not work. We rescued some slaves and got a few details. Then we came to the Great Hall, where we knew Caul held court. It was time to take down the villain (honestly, all I cared about at this point in the adventure).

We had two characters in disguise enter the hall, along with an invisible Sheila. Unfortunately for us, the Flayer of Men was not deceived - he ordered his gnolls to seize us! Sheila ran back down the stairs to tell the rest of the group and there was a mad scramble for a fighting position at the doorway.





At this point I was so stoked that it was impossible to contain myself, I was vibrating in my seat. I hope my excitement did not render me too much of a pain in the ass at the table...

While most of the group battled the gnolls, Sheila snuck up behind Caul and hit him with a Hold Person spell [he failed his saving throw, rolling a 2!]. Once again the feared antipaladin had been brought low, and in the same manner as in Huso's home game!

[Cue George Lucas saying: "It's like poetry. It rhymes."]

After the battle our fighter [run by Theo, IIRC] put on Caul's armour and posed as the master of the castle. After a short detour to the slave pens to fight the ogre slave-master [and good use of Speak with Dead by Grutzi] we progressed to the final confrontation in the drow witch's sanctum. 

We had concocted a great plan. Our illusionist disguised us as gnoll troops with Spectral Force and we accompanied "Caul," following at a respectful distance. Our fighter started a conversation, walked right up to the witch and used his magical shield to create a dome of force, trapping her inside with him. Welcome to the thunderdome, baby!!!

At this point we unleashed as much power as we could and the fight escalated quickly: the evil cultists were targeted with a barrage of Hold Person spells, the monk grabbed the Divine Child and ran, while the rumoured Giant Mutant Crustaceans emerged from all around us, pincers ready! Sheila ran after the monk invisibly to provide backup while the rest of the group used spells, special abilities and some great attack rolls to destroy the gigantic man-eating crabs.

When the battle was done, the witch surrendered. Our fighter stripped her of her gear and spared her life with the following words:

"Return to the under-realms that spawned you, and know that your queen just witnessed your defeat!"

Awesome. Becker ran a tight ship, and the rest of the players were on the ball, coming up with really good plans and schemes, one after another. At this point the session had run long by about 20 minutes - we were late for dinner! Flushed with victory, we filled out some feedback sheets and hauled ass down to...


***

Dinner & The Auction

We laughed, we cried, we spent a mountain of Euros!

Dinner was roast pig, a patrician choice by the convention. Because I was late, I didn't eat as much as I should have. After Becker's game I was flying high on the thrill of victory, buckets of coffee, adrenaline, and a few beers on an empty stomach. This explains a little bit of what came next...

Settembrini held forth masterfully, describing the merits of every item and its place in gaming history. Many folks had donated games from their own collections, even pieces of original artwork!

An array of games both old and new appeared on the block. Some old Das Schwarz Auge material was snapped up (great to see some national pride from the Germans for their own homegrown RPG). Several classic Judges Guild books (Castles II and Temples, IIRC) disappeared in the blink of an eye, the prices raising so fast that I was left breathless, unable to even bid!

I steeled myself and resolved to get in on the action. Assisting in this plan, Chomy placed an assortment of Hungarian liquors on the table with a conspiratorial smile, inviting me to sample the various flavours. They were all quite smooth, and I was certain none of them had been made in a bathtub. At the same time, Becker slid a bottle of some kind of fancy high-proof American whisky down the table for us to try.

The contest was on! After throwing out a few numbers and being outbid at every turn, I found myself in a neck-and-neck contest with a German at another table who would simply add 1 Euro to my own bid in a vicious campaign to troll me (and raise more money for the Con, I'll wager...). With Parti banging on the glass behind me and waving his wallet, Prince slapping me on the shoulder, and the crowd's noise urging me to ever greater boldness, I persisted and won an original piece of Andrew W's artwork: the town of Silvash from Melan's Cloister of the Frog God!

At this juncture a bottle of Jamieson appeared in front of me as if by magic (another Irish trick by Lynchpin, I suspect). Flushed with success I threw out more bids, won a purple and gold Cauldron dice bag and pumped the numbers up on several more lots without winning them. Even losing at this auction was great fun, cheers to all the participants who scored so many great items!

It is at about this point, dear reader, that your narrator slowly - and then rapidly - lost the thread of his tale. Darkness took me, and I strayed out of thought and time, wandering on roads that I dare not tell...


.


..


...


I regained my senses outside in the fresh air and had a nice chat with Chomy, who was kind enough to look after me. Perhaps he felt some nagging guilt for introducing this effete Anglo to his devastating Eastern European concoctions?

Either way, I was rendered totally incapable of playing in Attronarch's game in Block III (the only disappointment of the con, I really wanted to see how he does the Wilderlands!) and retired with some water and a few extra-strength Advil, thankful that I hadn't caused an excessive amount of mayhem.

To get a true sense of the experience, consult:


PALINKA MISCIBILITY TABLE (d6*d20):

1 - [SLURS]
2 - have a pleasant conversation
3 - go to bed early
4 - say "I'll tell you what, bud!" and then fall over
5 - leave unidentifiable crud on character sheet
6 - fight a Turk
7 - punch whoever is sitting next to you
8 - bid 2x more than planned
9 - run out of darts, stop rolling immediately
10 - throw up during a game
11 - swear to never drink again... and this time, mean it
12 - bidding war with a German
13 - raise the roof
14 - off-colour jokes during auction
15-17 - shout "HELL YEAH!" after anyone says anything
18 - wake up feeling pretty okay, considering
19 - swear revenge on duplicitious potion vendor
20 - death in 2d6 turns


Stay tuned for the senses-shattering conclusion of DAY 3!!!

Saturday, October 25, 2025

Cauldron Con AAR: Day 1

Greetings Blogland! I have returned home from a low-ceilinged garret by the frigid Atlantic (an AirBNB in Iceland) where I was recuperating from the weekend's excesses and doing some light tourism. Now, the tales of woe can be told.

Cauldron Con began inauspiciously: after a few weeks of European travel I won't bore you with here, we packed our bags a final time and set out from Amsterdam a day early. The party consisted of Princeofnothing, the infamously cruel dutch reviewer; Particularist, the mad autist of Ransack fame; and your humble scribe. Attempting to drive a reasonable (but fun) speed on the autobahn, we were beset by etheral windmills looming from the mists and BMWs going 200kph (our little rental was barely capable of that speed), but we made it to a small and quaint German town, apparently ripped straight from the pages of The Witcher.


Pregaming

There we met up with discord stalwart Doof and his Northern comrade Niklas, and played the harshest session of Ransack I've seen so far. Parti had converted Slyth Hive, Prince's famous high-level AD&D module, to his own system. We used 12th-level pregens created in the depths of Dave Hargrave's most feverish unconscious (Prince's M-U had 3 clone replacements, Doof's ranger was a bird-man(?), and my changeling assassin had a nuclear bomb!!).

We assailed the slyth, using Prince's knowledge of his own adventure to our advantage. My assassin was mind-blasted to hell in the first encounter, but not before killing 170 slyth with Dust of Sneezing & Choking. Delving to level 3 with my replacement PC, a monk, we managed to slay 2 froghemoths in a single round with judicious (and risky) use of our special abilities. But not before the monk was turned into a super-werewolf, tore himself from a froghemoth's stomach, and ate the magic-user, whose clone arrived in time to see the monk revert to human form.

On the aquatic level, we fried a school of piranhas using a sentient energy-blasting lichen we had befriended, and Prince knew where the best treasure was buried... We had scored big, but it didn't feel at all like cheating.

Overall, a brutal affair played at an almost incomprehensible power level. Would play again, and Ransack rules.

By this point it was perhaps 2 AM and, energy flagging, we packed it in. I spent a restless night on a cold and lumpy AirBNB couch which I volunteered for in my usual "no problem bro, I've been doing this for 20 years" fashion. As it turned out, this would prove no impediment.



DAY ONE

After an artful breakfast served by a peppery old German fellow in a restaurant far too nice for us, we were ready to drive onwards to Cauldron!





The village of Rosenthal was the perfect place to hold the event: small and picturesque. We arrived early, stowed our gear and got acquainted with the venue. The indefatigable organizer Settembrini (assisted by his whole family - incredibly wholesome to see!) was running around, talking to people and setting things up. We were greeted by one affable German after another, all helpful (contradicting the reports I'd read regarding the Teutonic personality...). Someone's labradoodle ran everywhere. A massive cooler of beer lay outside ripe for plundering, an assortment of food, coffee and snacks inside. In one corner, a gigantic Chainmail game was being set up.

I found my designated game space in a narrow, rustic-looking upstairs hall with low ceiling timbers and long wooden tables. As folks arrived, I scrambled to finish writing up the pregen characters for my adventure. In all the chaos of my European vacation, I had not had time! In fact I didn't even bring blank sheets, but had to create them by hand the day before (Prince's wife helped - my wrist thanks her!). Giving myself 2 hours was not quite enough. I heard clapping from downstairs and realized I was missing the entire opening ceremonies! The only sound in the upper hall was the scratching of my pencil, the flipping of OSRIC pages, and the blood pounding in my ears.

I went outside to smoke with 5 minutes to spare before game time. As I tried to get into "DM character" I wondered: who would sign up for my game? Would it be fun? Had I cut the adventure to the right size? Should there really be 2 Caryatid Columns in room 24, or perhaps I should add a third?

And most pressing: what if nobody liked the way I handled AD&D initiative?

I should have known what would happen.


***

Friday Block I
Gilded Dream of the Incandescent Queen






DM: Me

Players:
GusB - Edward the Scissorhands, fighter 5 and his henchman Wigmund
Prince - Torglul, elf fighter 4/M-U 4
Melan - Sir Glyptodont, paladin 4
Doof - Bluff, dwarf fighter 4/thief 5
Lynchpin - John Magic, M-U 5
Alex - Arok, ranger 5
Chris - Berek, cleric 5


I returned to the table and was faced with a motley crew of sellswords hungry for gold, glory and earnest violence... and I knew things would turn out fine.

A group of adventurers was teleported into Queen Purah's summer palace, a floating sanctum on the Plane of Air. There she conducted alchemical experiments and sought the secret of eternal life. Had she succeeded? It had been 1000 years since the Queen was last seen. The group not only had to loot the place and find out what happened, but discover a way to escape in the allotted time!

After meeting some butlers made of clouds, the party skipped the Meeting Room. Using his partial dungeon map, Bluff got a sense of the area and the group entered the Hall of Primaries where they used Edward's henchman Wigmund to test out some ideas. Bleeding from his ears, the long-suffering Northman nevertheless executed his orders [good morale check helped by some healing] and the sealed door was opened!

In what would become a running theme, Sir Glyptodont used Detect Evil on everything and instantly clocked a sinister-looking book, dousing it in oil and burning it. The group looted some nice magic items and treasure and moved on.

In a vast hall, they rescued some radioactive butterflies from a pack of bloodthirsty skeletons with a well-placed Turn Undead and some missile attacks. They explored a room suffused in magical darkness [wisely turning the undead inside, which they couldn't see but just KNEW were in there]. In a corpse's backpack they found an invitation to the palace with the Queen's seal - useful!

Emerging in another entryway, they were accosted by flickering, man-shaped lightning elementals, calling "come play with us!" Reasoning that these electric beings could be grounded out, Arok opened his Decanter of Endless Water [I should have thought this one through...]. The bottle made its saving throw and the creatures arced out with a CRACK and the smell of ozone, without the ranger being zapped himself.

The party defeated more skeletons by bashing open a pit trap and found a secret door into the stables where they met Mr. Hall and Mr. Waits, confused celestial beings who seemed friendly enough [a paladin, a good reaction roll, and not bringing along the assassin helped here]. These two agreed to lead the group to "The Stairs," apparently the path they had taken to enter the palace.

The group entered a huge jungle cave - clearly some kind of extradimensional space - where they were attacked by tropical fire-spitting birds and drank from a magical fountain [all the rolls were great here, plenty of healing].

[It was at this point that someone in the group pointed out this game's timeslot was THREE hours, not four! Like the hard-charging mercenaries they were, the whole group kicked into fifth gear. Watching them coalesce into a decisive and aggressive commando team at this point was incredibly fun.]

The party ascended to the second level and opened a few doors, but did not tarry - their goal lay on the top floor. A vast hall floating above the clouds, littered with corpses, and on a great throne of jade rested the body of the Incandescent Queen herself!

The M-U and cleric sallied forth in gaseous and ethereal form to investigate. Using Unseen Servant, John Magic began pilfering the Queen's golden jewelry and the invitation she held in her hands. When her mask was lifted she awoke, an enraged undead monstrosity [as if there was any doubt!].

The party came prepared for war. A Fireball from John Magic, a barrage of missile attacks, and clutch shots by Sir Glyptodont, Torglul and Edward made short work of the evil Queen. Out of time, with a Queen's Invitation in hand, the party was able to get the teleporter password from one of the butlers and return home safely. Not bad for 3 hours' work!

Well played, gentlemen! This group kicked rich amounts of ass, especially considering they only had 3 hours to do it in. The Queen never stood a chance. Tight, tactical and aggressive, just what I wanted to see.

[A full breakdown of treasure, kills & XP will come in its own post later, stay tuned.]

After this frenetic ending we broke for dinner, consisting of a mountain of grilled German sausages and potatoes which I shoveled into my face at high speed. I talked and laughed with my players about the session, met some strangers and heard stories of their games, and unwound after all the day's excitement.

But things weren't over yet...


***

Friday Block II
Rivers of Blood, Death and Glory
Blackrazor Cup tournament module



DM: Grutzi

Players:
(sorry, I forgot to write it all down, this is based on my fallible memory)
Me - cleric
James - halfling thief
Chris - M-U
Melan - dwarf fighter
GusB - monk
Lynchpin - elf fighter/M-U, I think
Doof - bard
Niklas - ranger


Tackling the legendary Blackrazor Cup this year was a gritty challenge. The pregens filtered down the table until Gus, stuck at the very end, disgustedly picked up a monk (sorry bud!). While he frantically looked up the rules for his class, I had a few minutes to choose my cleric spells based on the opening blurb (good thing I paid attention!) and we were off.

Our group set out into a frigid mountain dungeon. We played tightly and tactically and had initial success against a group of yetis using Lynchpin's Web spell. Disaster almost struck when we entered a large chamber and the first two ranks were paralysed for 3 rounds by the yetis' gazes!! Somehow the monk, thief and (I think) ranger managed to hold the line for 3 rounds until the rest of the group could recover. The last yeti covered in Faerie Fire was tossed into a pit, the eerie glow illuminating over a dozen bloodthirsty wights. No thanks! This fight bogged us down for a while, but once the combat was done we really took off running.

In a vast hall we discovered a throne of ice inset with giant diamonds. No problem, I had prepared Resist Cold and Melan's dwarf was happy to pry them out. After taking these we explored a room with a crystal ball [we pondered it for a while]. Divination helped here, along with demihumans' ability to detect secret doors. Peeking through one we found revealed a mighty stone golem waiting in the hall, guarding stairs upwards - uh oh!

Locate Object, searching for an item to use against the golem, led us to the south into a room with a corpse holding a weapon and wearing an ornate chain of office. Various ideas were considered, until I decided the cleric would bash in the skull of the corpse - just to make sure, you understand. This was the wrong move, as a spectre revealed itself, and laughed off my attempt to Turn Undead! The horror was dispatched but not before draining 2 levels from Melan's dwarf.

This harrowing experience aside, we looted the corpse's identifying chain, which of course allowed us to pass down the hall past the stone golem unharmed. This led into the treasure room, where heaped before us were the treasures of uncounted ages!

After transporting it all back to our boat, we had a few options: would it be possible to pass by the golem up the stairs, somehow? Scouting with Wizard Eye revealed valuable treasures. James even boldly tried to climb his halfling thief over the golem's head and got bashed with a stony fist for his troubles.

A few ideas were proposed, but it was getting late and we were running out of time. Instead, we looted the crystal ball from the previous room (good job disarming that trap James), and loaded everything out onto our raft. Victory was ours!

By my tally, we had removed over 200,000 gp worth of treasure from the dungeon. Could anyone else do better? We didn't think so at the time...


***

When the adventure was done it was already about midnight, or maybe 1 AM? Time enough to have a snack and maybe one more drink, then pass out in my bunk and set an alarm for 7:00 AM when we would do it all over again...

Monday, October 20, 2025

 Cauldron Con was fantastic. Full report to follow...





Wednesday, October 1, 2025

Cauldron Con!

Hi blogland,

I am going to Cauldron Con in Germany this year, so come by and say hi! I am running Gilded Dream of the Incandescent Queen (Convention Edition). Look for the Canadian metalhead and that's probably me!




Tuesday, May 6, 2025

HOT OFF THE PRESS!

Time for a few high-powered updates from your humble interlocutor:


OSRIC 3.0 CROWDFUNDING

The original retroclone! Rising from the ashes of the OGL debacle, Mythmere Games fires up a crowdfunding campaign to make sure Corpo-gaming can never fuck with us again. Based on Creative Commons, with the brand-new AELF license for adventure writers. The final age is upon us, the end of history, the eternal AD&D. As God and Gary intended!!!



Backerkit campaign is HERE. Get stoked and sign up now, scum!!!


FIGHT ON! #16

The premier old-school zine is back in force with a second new issue! This one has been out for a little while, and this time I contributed. My Terrible City Guards table is inside!



Get it here:

Print version

PDF version


Go do your homework and support the old-school Gs who have been sticking their necks out to bring the rest of us Vintage Thrill-Power since you posers were in diapers playing Shadowdark.

That's all for now blogland! 

Tuesday, July 30, 2024

IT HAS RISEN AGAIN!

Ladies and gentlemen, Fight On! magazine is BACK!!!

After almost 15 years, the premiere zine of the Old School Renaissance has returned in force. 

Go get it HERE (Print or PDF) on Lulu!



[Also: has Blogger gotten even worse? I think so. Fuck off Google.]