Intelligent Magic Items

A post many years in the making!

After finishing that "Knights in Orcus' Service" post and knocking around ideas for the other Chaos patrons in my setting, I realized I needed my own rules for demon weapons. Creating these items for my home game, I've been forced to cobble things together haphazardly. It's been rather annoying and nothing has felt quite right, so this is my attempt to streamline the rules for my home games - in whatever version of D&D I happen to be playing.

After using these rules several times in my home game, I feel good enough about them to post up. If I change them in the future I may come back and edit this.

First, let's examine the books I already have:

Realm of Chaos: Slaves to Darkness - The rules for Demon Weapons are cool as fuck, and clearly inspired by Elric. "Slays any unit it hits" is a bit much though. The magic effects from the Chaos Weapons section are good and the artwork is of course fantastic.

Awesome, but it will need some massaging to work within D&D.
We will come back to it later.


The Metamorphica Revised - The 'Ficto-Technica' section has tables for magic items. The best table is the one on pg. 208, "Demon-Possessed Items":

This will come up later on. 

Just get it, it's $10 for the revised pdf or get the classic version FREE!


AD&D DMG - Pages 166-168.

The standard to which all others are compared! Tables for personality and special goals are fantastic, but the whole system is pretty complicated and you have to flip back & forth. As usual, it could do with a bit of organizing.

I will be using the DMG as the baseline. From there I have attempted to streamline the mathematics and make things a little simpler while calibrating for my home setting.

*****

CREATING INTELLIGENT MAGIC ITEMS

0: Start

Per the DMG - we begin with an existing magic item. It could be a standard book item or one of the DM's own devising. This system was originally for magic swords but could be applied to anything: other weapons, wands, rings, armour or whatever.

From there, a simple 6-step process:

1: Roll for item INT

2: Roll for Alignment

3: Roll for Special Abilities

4: Roll for Special Purpose

5: Roll # of Languages Spoken, if applicable

6: Calculate EGO & Personality Strength

1: Intelligence and Capabilities (%)

We begin with the base tables from the DMG to see if it has intelligence and a mode of communication, and determine starting EGO rating:

01-50: No intelligence. Stop here.

51-75: No intelligence, but a strong alignment. Roll on Step 2 and then stop.
76-83: INT 12, EGO 1, semi-empathy
84-89: INT 13, EGO 2, empathy
90-94: INT 14, EGO 3, speech
95-97: INT 15, EGO 4, speech
98-99: INT 16, EGO 5, speech, read nonmagical languages/maps
00: INT 17, EGO 11, speech/telepathy, read magical writings

Or, if you are going to make an intelligent item anyway, use this chart expanded to the full percentage range to avoid a lot of rerolling:

01-31: INT 12, EGO 1, semi-empathy
32-56: INT 13, EGO 2, empathy
57-76: INT 14, EGO 3, speech
77-88: INT 15, EGO 4, speech
89-96: INT 16, EGO 5, speech, read nonmagical languages/maps
97-00: INT 17, EGO 11, speech/telepathy, read magical writings

EXAMPLE - I begin with a magical +2 sword. I have no particular plan for this item, so let's see what the dice give me on the top chart. Rolling for intelligence I got a 91, lucky! This sword has INT 14, EGO 3 and the power of speech.

2: Alignment (d20)

If you use simple law/chaos alignment like I do, just ignore the good/evil component of the result.

Remember that all cursed weapons are Neutral.

1-5: Lawful Good

6: Lawful Neutral

7: Lawful Evil

8-11: Neutral Good

12-15: True Neutral

16: Neutral Evil

17: Chaotic Good

18-19: Chaotic Neutral

20: Chaotic Evil

Simple alignment: if Chaotic, 30% chance of a demon item

AD&D alignment: if any Evil, 40% chance of a demon (or daemon or devil) item

Unintelligent but Aligned Items

Simple: Can be wielded or held by anyone, but activated & special abilities only work if alignment matches exactly. Plain +x items are reduced by one 'plus' for every step of alignment difference.

AD&D: Can be wielded by anyone, but activated & special abilities only work if all non-neutral elements of the item's alignment match the wielder's (a Lawful Neutral item can be used by anyone Lawful). This doesn't work in reverse - a Lawful Good item can only be used by Lawful Good characters. Plain +x items are reduced by one 'plus' for every step of alignment difference on either axis.

Intelligent Items

Simple: Handling an item of opposite alignment deals damage equal to item EGO. Handling an item one 'step' away (item or wielder is Neutral) deals 1/2 damage.

AD&D: All non-neutral elements of the item's alignment must match (as above), or handling the item deals damage equal to item EGO.

Demon Items

Can be used by characters of any ethos, all the better to corrupt them to the forces of darkness.

EXAMPLE - I use Simple alignment in my game. I rolled a 5, indicating the sword is Lawful.

3: Special Abilities

Roll for abilities based on item's INT:

INT 12: 1 detection ability
INT 13-14: 2 detection abilities
INT 15-16: 3 detection abilities
INT 17: 3 detection abilities, 1 extraordinary power

Detection Ability (%)
01-08 - detect shifting rooms/walls/sloping passages 10'

09-16 - detect traps 10'

17-24 - detect undead 20'

25-30 - detect opposing alignments 10'

31-36 - detect similar alignments 10'

37-45 - detect precious metals, kind and amount 20'

46-54 - detect gems, kind and number 5'
55-66 - detect magic 10'

67-69 - detect illusions 10'

70-74 - detect secret doors 5'

75-80 - see invisible 10'

81-85 - locate object 120'

86-93 - roll twice, ignoring this result or higher (add 2 EGO)

94-00 - roll for extraordinary power (add 2 EGO)

Extraordinary Power (%)

01-06 - determine direction and depth, 1d2/day

07-14 - enlarge/reduce on wielder, 1d2/day

15-21 - spider climb for 1 turn, 1d3/day

22-28 - clairaudience for 1 round, 30' range 1d3/day

29-35 - clairvoyance for 1 round, 30' range 1d3/day

36-40 - ESP for 1 round, 30' range 1d3/day

41-46 - charm person on hit, 1d3/day

47-50 - knock, 1/day

51-56 - strength on wielder, 1/day

57-61 - invisibility to item's enemies for 1 turn, 1d2/day

62-66 - levitation for 1 turn, 1d3/day

67-70 - fly, 1 hour/day (add 1d3 EGO)

71-75 - illusion as the wand, 120' range 1d2/day (add 1d3 EGO)

76-80 - x-ray vision for 1 turn, 40' range 1d2/day (add 1d4 EGO)

81-86 - telekinesis for 1 round, 1d2/day (add 1d3 EGO)

87-90 - telepathy, 60' range 1d2/day (add 1d4 EGO)

91-94 - teleport, 1/day (add 1d4+1 EGO)

95-97 - heal, 1/day (add 1d4+1 EGO)

98-00 - Roll twice, ignore this result again (add 2 EGO)

EXAMPLE - INT 14 gives 2 rolls on the Detection Table.
I rolled 03 - "detect shifting walls/rooms/sloping passages," and 71 - "detect secret doors." Not bad!

4: Special Purpose of Intelligent Item (d%)

Every intelligent item should have a special purpose. 

All these goals are filtered by alignment. A lawful sword that must 'defeat or slay' will only select chaotic enemies of its chosen category, etc.

01-15: overthrow opposite alignment (or "maintain balance" if Neutral)
16-85: defeat or slay:
     16-22: divine magic users (incl. divine entities, etc)

     23-30: arcane magic users (incl. magic-using monsters)

     31-37: fighters
     38-44: thieves
     45-55: all non-human monsters
     56-63: particular creature type (humanoids, undead, demons, etc)
     64-71: particular race or kind of creature (elves, orcs, ghouls, etc)
     72-78: servants of a specific deity
     79-85: everyone!!
86-92: defend a particular race or kind of creature

93-00: defend interests of a specific deity

Intelligent items generally prefer to use their powers in pursuit of their special purpose, but will do so for general tasks as long as they are kept happy. Using the item in opposition to its special purpose (aiding those the item wishes to destroy, etc) provokes an immediate personality conflict.

EXAMPLE - Rolling for Special Purpose, I get a 75 - "defeat or slay servants of a specific deity." Since the sword is Lawful, I decide to randomly select from the Chaotic powers in my setting. I end up with INMA, EMPRESS OF THE WORLD, a petty god worshipped by degenerated elves.

5: Languages Spoken

It's assumed the item can understand its wielder in any case. This determines the number of languages the item can speak aloud, if it is able. Per the DMG:

# of languages (%)
01-40: One
41-70: Two
71-85: Three (+1 EGO)
86-95: Four (+1 EGO)
96-99: Five (+2 EGO)
00: Six (+2 EGO)

What Language? (%)

Here is a chart from my game as an example.

01-15 - Imperial (aka Common Viridian)

15-20 - Alryan

21-25 - Antillian

26-30 - Dunael

31-35 - Ghinoran

36-40 - Skandik

41-45 - Tharbrian

46-50 - Amazon

51-55 - Altanian

56-60 - Avalonian

61-65 - Orichalan

66-70 - Old High Viridian

71-72 - Wild Speech

73-74 - Skeletongue

75-76 - Duvan'Ku

77-87 - Grimscribe

88-91 - Demonic

92-93 - Wild Elf/Bog Elf

94-95 - Lizardfolk

96-99 - Chthonic Elf

00 - Something really old/rare (draconic or something else cool)

EXAMPLE - Here I rolled fairly low, a 15. The sword can speak one language. I rolled Wild Elvish and decided it was made by the elves to destroy the heretical cult of Inma!

6. EGO Modifiers & Personality Strength

1 - Begin with item's starting EGO score as per Step 1.

2 - Add 1 EGO for every magical 'plus' an item has. Double this bonus for weapons that came into the process with special abilities (a +1 sword adds +1 EGO, a +3 sword of sharpness adds +6 EGO, etc) 

If the item is some weird thing from an OSR blog with no pluses you must use your discretion. Eyeball a power level between 1 (+1 sword, simple misc. magic item) and 10 (+5 holy avenger, staff of the magi). If you're completely stuck roll 1d10, or 1d6+1d4, or whatever.

3 - Include bonuses from Step 3 and Step 5, if any.

4 - Add the item's INT + EGO together to find its Personality Strength (PS).

EXAMPLE - The sword started with EGO 4. Add 2 for the sword's +2 bonus.

Total EGO of 6.

"Xyrxidon" Sword +2, Lawful

INT 14, EGO 6, speaks wild elvish

Detect shifting rooms/walls/sloping passages in 10' , detect secret doors in 5'

Resolving Personality Conflicts

Personality conflicts arise when the intelligent item's desires are not being met by its wielder. These contests are resolved with Personality Strength scores. 

The wielder of an item has Personality Strength equal to their INT + CHA + level.  This diminishes as the character suffers damage. The experience level component of this formula is reduced in proportion to hit point damage suffered.

 

The DMG explains it quite Gygaxianly, it's actually less math than it seems. The DM needs to calculate this just once (and when the character gains a level). Find the character's hp breakpoint at which the item's PS is higher than his, and make a note of it. There is no need to keep track of floating modifiers, since they don't matter most of the time.

EXAMPLE - Tjarg the Fighter is 5th level with 9 INT, 9 CHA and 30 hp. He normally has a Personality Strength of 5+9+9 = 23. For every 1/5 of his total hp he loses (6 points in this case) he deducts 1 point from his PS - so at 24 hp his PS is reduced to 22, at 18 hp it is 21 and so on.

If Tjarg is using our +2 sword above with its INT 14 & EGO 6 (PS of 20), you can see clearly at 12 hp he is tied with the sword and once his hp reaches 6, the sword's personality is stronger than his! All Tjarg's DM needs to do is write down "Tjarg loses contest w/sword at 6 hp."

As long as the item has a lower Personality Strength than its wielder, it can make its desires known and refuse to use its abilities if frustrated, but has no power over the character.

When an intelligent item has a PS higher than its wielder it may dominate him at any time. It may force him to attack certain opponents or allies, refuse to strike foes, force him to surrender or to drop it, etc. The likelihood of this happening depends on the relationship between item and wielder. It may make other additional demands - encrustation with gems, a fancy scabbard or case to be stored in, other efforts toward favoured causes, things like that.

Optional Rule for Personality Conflicts:

One thing I don't like about the DMG rules: it is trivial to roll up an intelligent weapon that will never win a personality conflict! This doesn't seem that exciting to me. Maybe you want a bit more uncertainty in your game?

It requires a bit more note-taking. The DM must note the wielder's Personality Strength at multiple breakpoints. Perhaps full hp, slightly hurt, half hp and near death. Keep these notes nearby for reference. When a personality conflict arises, the DM rolls 1d8 for both the item and wielder, adding it to their PS scores before resolving the contest.

EXAMPLE - A magical boon has increased Tjarg's INT and CHA scores to 10. His Personality Score is now 25. His humble sword can only win a battle of wills when he has 0 hp left - not very useful! Instead, the DM notes his Personality Strength at 12 hit points (PS 22) and 6 (PS 21).

During a difficult fight Tjarg gets hurt badly, reducing his hp to 11 (therefore, PS to 22). His sword has new plans for him and attempts to take control. The DM rolls 1d8 for each of them. Tjarg gets a 3, totaling 25. The sword rolls an 8, totaling 28. Today isn't Tjarg's lucky day...

I have not tested this idea very much. It would have to be calibrated. You could make it more or less random by changing the size of the die. If you used a d4 or d6, upset results would be rare. A d20 would make the whole thing way too random. d8 or d10 seems like a nice middle ground - the die roll will count for about 1/4 to 1/3 of success or failure, with the remainder upheld by statistics. Just enough that one can't be certain all the time!

Optional Rule for Different Versions of the Game:

The DMG rules are calibrated for players with certain statistics. Probably using 4d6 drop-the-lowest method, or perhaps something more generous than that. From the anecdotal evidence I've seen, successful AD&D PCs tend to have 1, 2 or even 3 exceptional statistics (15 or over), with the rest hovering around average. Consider this when calibrating the PS of your intelligent items.

If you play B/X and use 3d6 in order, for example, maybe you would reduce all item PS scores by 10-20% to balance out the lower stats.

[CHANGES]

This system will generate intelligent items that are slightly different from the DMG version in some ways:

Section 1 - Ignore "no intelligence, but strongly aligned" and this is exactly as per the DMG, I just condensed the math for you.

Aligned items being commonplace adds a sense that they were created for a real purpose. Picking up a wand of fireballs that only works for Chaotics, an Evil sword of sharpness, or a suit of armour made by a Lawful cleric helps to embed these items in the game world.

Section 2 - I rearranged the order of the alignments so that law, neutrality and chaos were grouped together, but the chances of rolling a given alignment are still the same. Effects of opposing alignments are standard for AD&D 2-axis system, and extrapolated from there for simple alignment. [EDIT - I had to fix this. Before damage was impossible if the wielder was Neutral, lame]

Effects of aligned, but unintelligent weapons are my own. 

Demon weapons will occur about 6% of the time, and be explained in a later post.

Section 3 - The first table is BTB.

Extraordinary Powers are more likely (7% instead of 2% BTB), but the really powerful ones will occur less often so this seems fair. Some of the better Extraordinary Powers now add extra EGO to the item. This is fair, since rolling up an item that lets you teleport or fly every day seems like a really big deal!

I reworked the abilities so they fit my game better and have more variety. Sloping passages and trick walls are rare in my dungeons (unlike in the old days) so I combined them into one result, then I added some other cool abilities, etc.

Section 4 - Basically the same but I added more purposes to the table to give it some variety.

I removed "special purpose powers," so you'll never get a disintegrate-on-hit sword, but those were only going to happen 0.02% of the time anyway, so who cares?

Section 5 - BTB, I just included the EGO modifiers to make your life easier.

Section 6 - BTB, I just helped with the math.

*****

This is already getting long, and even more tables are coming up so let's quit while we're ahead. Rules for Demon Weapons coming up in the next installment!

Random Monster Generator Shootout 6 - Blogosphere Rabbit Hole Remix!

So I stumbled across this somehow.
Probably on MeWe, where I follow some cool kids.
If you use it too, add me eh?

From that link I checked out several different monster generators on a few blogs, including some linked from the comments. Here is what I discovered:


*****

BUILT BY GODS LONG FORGOTTEN
Monster Remixes - links are on the right side of that page

Released as PDFs, one for each monster category (as delineated by Sham here). These are wild. I really wish they were compiled in one giant pdf document, but they were written years ago so what can you do?

Each one consists of a single page. They basically strip apart the traits, characteristics & special abilities of a particular category or flavour of monster, and spread them out across a series of tables. Each one is different, and the formatting & layout are all over the place. Let's look at the categories:

-"Beasts" of Fey Woodlands: animals with fairy tale abilities
-Humanoids of Fey Woodlands: elves, pixies and the like
-Dragons, Dragonesques & Chimera: an odd one, dragons share a page with grab-bag mixed animal shape beasts
-Esoteric Animals: random mundane animals with strange abilities
-Gorgons, Lycanthropes & Gargoyles: any monster that turns you to stone, or changes shape
-Humanoids: people-types, where they lair, what they look like and some of their behaviours
-Humans: for determining the size, composition and traits of a human fighting force
-Slimes, Molds and Jellies!: just like it says
-The Otherworldly: elementals & similar beings
-Undead: you get it

Let's have a few examples.

ESOTERIC ANIMALS
Type: cat
Size: large, horse-sized (3 HD)
Number: small group (d10)
Esoteric Trait: holding or touching one confers immunity to petrification

Well, that's an odd one...

UNDEAD
Form: corpse, child
Descriptor: bandaged (d8 damage)
Attacks: Mob, affected by normal weapons (-2 HD); Summons rats 3/day (+1 HD)
Vulnerabilities: magic, wood
HD: 3
AC: 5
No. Appearing: 3d6

This is good! A pack of bandaged-up children's corpses that can summon a horde of rats! Very Silent Hill. Perhaps they have a hive-mind and are treated as a single creature? Creepy.

DRAGONS, DRAGONESQUE & CHIMERA
Type: Chimera
Body: Big Cat (d8 damage)
Tail: Dragon (+1 AC, extra attack)
Wings: Yes
Trait: Headless Toothy Maw (swallowed if hit, or damage if body too large to swallow)
HD: 5
AC: 4
Attacks: 2*1d8
No. Appearing: 1d4

A great cat with a dragon's tail & wings and a fanged mouth instead of a head? That sounds hella gross and pretty cool. I am imagining a great cat-version of the Gaping Dragon from Dark Souls. I imagine it might be able to swallow a halfling whole, but not a human. Still would make a great abomination for the heroes to fight!

I must say that these really exceeded my expectations! A little recombination of familiar elements can yield cool results, and I would happily use these monsters in my game. If I had a complaint about these generators, it would be a matter of scope. The undead table will only give you undead, the slimes & molds table will only give you slimes & molds. The tables seem to only include possibilities that already exist in the monster books, and few (if any) new additions by the author. You won't find an undead monster with a breath weapon or an ooze that can drain levels. Also, these pdfs are laid out a bit crudely and are sometimes tough to parse, if that's important to you.

Having said that, the results you get are pretty damn cool. If you want a lightning-fast generator that'll give you a monster blending familiar elements in a new way, these will do that.

How Many Rolls: Lowest is 3, most common 5, highest extreme for one of the pages is 14.
Would I use these in the middle of a session: Yes. The upside of using familiar elements is the short learning curve. If I needed a monster was just a bit different (instead of completely crazy like what the RECG turns out), I could easily turn to these tables.
Variety and Reusability: Limited variety. But the reusability is good, as you can mix these basic elements together extensively.





SAVE VS. DRAGON
d30 Generators - there are quite a lot of them. If you just want the monsters, better to go to the post on DIY and dragons linked at the top, which links the monster generators individually.

This guy has a TON of different generators. Mr. LeBlanc also wrote the d30 Sandbox Generator (which I quite liked and perhaps should review some day soon). For now, we'll stay on topic with the monster tables. LeBlanc has done so many of these, they are all small one-page affairs but each one is a really nice-looking pdf, laid out cleanly and professionally. Far better than I could do in a month, and he seems to knock them out in a day! I found 29 of these one-page monster generators in a few minutes on his site.

They seem to take a few forms. For humanoids (bandits, elves, dwarves, berserkers, goblins, gnolls, things like that) there is a standard layout. The first table is "Group Background/Descriptions," with motivations and organizational cues for the group, like "explorers: lost as a result of a dwarvish prank" or "tribal unit/thugs: seeking slaves." This is a good start. Then we have "No. Appearing," which doubles as a leader/champion generator. Then "Arms/Armour/Mounts," which offers a bit of variety (orcs with flails riding dire wolves, or orcs with axes & crossbows? etc).

This is a basic template which is departed from in some cases: the orc page has an "Orc Tribe Name" table (like "vicious bone" and "baneful axe"), the berserker page has a "Celebrate Victory By..." table. These add some welcome colour if you're stuck trying to think of something.

Other creature types have completely different generators. Generally the less humanoid the creature is, the more different its page. I approve of this. The Sea Creature Generator comes with nice little pictures to illustrate various aquatic body shapes, and an old woodcut in the corner of some great beast smashing a ship. The Fiend Generator is the only two-page entry, and looks fun. Let's try a few:

BERSERKERS
Group Background/Description: transporting captives to use as slaves
Celebrate Victory By: cutting off opponents' hands and feet
No. Appearing: 20
Additional Fighters: 2 1st-level, 1 2nd-level, 1 7th-level subchief
Motivation: bloodlust
Weapon: polearm

Huh, that's quite detailed! I'll wager this would add some excitement to your "(3d10) Men, Berserkers" on the standard encounter table. Maybe the party comes across them just as they're be-handing a few victims and tying up the survivors as captives? Or maybe they carry the severed hands of their victims on big garlands? Either way it's going to be harsh!

FIENDS
General Form: ape-like
Size: medium
Base HD: 5
Visage: stretched
Body Shape/Muscle: skeletal, +0 HD
Body Surface/Density: hairy/bristled, thin (+1 AC)
Back/Wings: crested, insect-like
Appendages: 2 short arms, 6 long legs
Hand/Arm Features: animal-like talons
Foot/Leg Features: octopus-like suckers
Head: goat-like
Head Adornment: grotesque spine
Eyes: amber, multi-faceted
Ears/Mouth: trumpet-like, gaping toothed
Special Abilities: immunity: acid, electricity; electric breath; gas breath; regeneration; paralyzing touch
Talon Damage: 1d8
Bite Damage: 2d4

What...

the...

FUCK.

I love it! This can go on the shelf with Appendix D, which I reviewed in the very first edition of RMGS! This monster is very difficult to picture, which is honestly what I want in a demon generator. I will 100% use this, guaranteed. Top tier. Seal of fucking approval.

How Many Rolls: Many are only 3 rolls. Some only 1. The most complex might have 5 or 6, except the Fiend Generator which has 15+!
Would I use these in the middle of a session: Fuck yes. Not the Fiend Generator though, it's in a class of its own.
Variety and Reusability: Well. If you have stuff like Berserkers, Goblins and Orcs on your encounter table, there is simply no reason not to use these! Having said that, these tables don't really 'interlock' like some random monster generators in a way that would give you 13,000 possible results or what-have-you. What they can do is add variety & interest for those bog-standard monsters on your encounter table that we're all used to. Go check them out!




OLD GUARD GAMING
The Unexpurgated Dragon Generator

This blog has been around for a long time, and I never came across it. It's really good. I'm just going to quote Palmer at length here:

"...I make a distinction between monsters (species in the Gygaxian Naturalism tradition), and MONSTERS (unnatural unique creatures which don't have to follow the rules of Nature). I employ both in my own Greyhawk, and my players can never be certain just what the hell they're up against in any given encounter. It adds spice to the game and checks the overconfidence that leads to complacency and boredom. Dragons especially seem to get over-defined in the game. Ancient and medieval dragons were extremely varied in form. Like elves and goblins and such in myth, they were rarely described in the same way consistently.
A randomly generated dragon will bring to your game some of that fear of the unknown which was the norm for people before the reign of technology."

That's what I'm talking about. This generator randomly determines age, size, hit dice and attacks like you'd expect. Also there are tables for special attacks & defenses, unique breath weapons, colours, special motivations and other strange things. I'll just show you with an example:

Int: very

AL: lawful

Age: adult (5 hp/die)

Size: enormous

AC: 6

HD: 11-14
Move: 9 ground/24 flying
Attacks: 2
Damage: 2-12, 2-12
Breath Weapon: cone of sound (1-8 dmg per hit die, save or be deafened permanently)
General Characteristics: construct
General Form: serpentine, bipedal rear legs, forearms, wings
Primary/Secondary colours: red, black
% in Lair: 10%
Speaking: Yes
Magic Use: No
Sleeping: Yes
Purpose or Obsession: to accumulate treasure
Allies/Minions: a non-dragon mate (the dragon is capable of breeding with other creatures!)

Wow, what to make of this one? A construct dragon with a monstrous mate? Perhaps it's a fleshly dragon-golem of some kind, created or commissioned by its mate for companionship, like the Bride of Frankenstein? Maybe a robo-dragon that found another robot to team up with, and they're building a new monstrous "child"? I could just throw this thing at my players, or I could sit down and explore the possibilities. Seems like there is a whole adventure or two in here if you want it. Awesome.

How Many Rolls: 26-32!
Would I use this in the middle of a session: Hmmm it's pretty long. It wouldn't be my first choice under time pressure. If I needed a dragon that quickly, I'd use stock stats and roll on a few of these tables to turn it away from the norm just slightly.
Variety and Reusability: Well... you're going to get a dragon. But since dragons are normally all the same, I'd say you could reuse this basically forever!


IN CONCLUSION

I thought this series had run out of steam. I'm glad to be proved wrong by folks releasing cool things on their blogs. No glossy books or fancy production values (well, LeBlanc's pdfs are a bit fancy).

If I could only pick one favourite, it's a toss-up between LeBlanc's Fiend Generator and the Unexpurgated Dragon Generator. Obviously the utterly bizarre multiplicity of demonic forms is a topic very close to my heart. But that dragon generator, man... it's a thing of beauty. The fact is that I will use almost everything I looked at today (except the orc generator, because I don't have orcs in my campaign setting!).

Just go out and download 'em, okay?


*****

Well this has rambled on for quite a while. Time to relax!!

Thoughts on Reaction Rolls & Campaign Updates

Remember when I reviewed the mathematics for my random encounter tables? Today I have been thinking about the humble reaction roll. I use these and the morale rules (taken straight from Labyrinth Lord) in every game I run. I transplanted them into my Mathfinder game and they work fantastically. These days I would at a minimum hesitate to run a game without these kinds of rules.

So here are a few things I like to do to mess with reaction rolls. Some I've been doing for a while, but I was inspired to post about them when I remembered a conversation on d4 caltrops quite a while back. Ktrey really ran with the idea of overloading various rolls to create more information about a monster! This breakdown is a bit simpler but these techniques work well for me, and hopefully the reader may find them useful.

By The Numbers

Note: I've inverted the normal "lower is better" reaction roll for ease of use, so +1 is an improvement and -1 is a penalty. No need to confuse things.

Reaction Table (2d6):
2: hostile, attacks
3-5: unfriendly, may attack
6-8: neutral, uncertain
9-11: indifferent, uninterested
12: friendly, helpful

Normal PF stat modifiers are +1/-1 for every 2 points away from 10. Obviously I use the stat modifiers from Labyrinth Lord to match the reaction rules. This is funny because my players ask "What does my 'Reaction Skill' mean? Why is the bonus so low? Why can't I put points into it?" I have to explain it all every time.

LL's CHA modifier table looks like this:
3: -2
4-8: -1
9-12: +0
13-17: +1
18: +2

Not much of a bonus, but on a 2d6 roll it really changes the game. Jeff talks about this here. Even a 13 CHA makes "instant hostility" impossible, and that 18-CHA paladin makes friends with a monster on 10, 11 or 12! As always with classic D&D, the rules support each other if you use them all together: rolling stats straight down the line means having a character with the gift of gab is a lucky situation not to be overlooked.


Circumstance Modifiers

The basic thing I do to mess around with reaction rolls is a flat modifier based on the temperament of the creature, or circumstances in the dungeon or wilderness region. A few examples from my Land's End random encounter tables:

Lizardmen: Neutral, standoffish.
Jungle Bear: +2 to reaction. Rarely hostile unless provoked or near food/cubs.
Goblins: -1 to reaction. Jumpy and irritable from being cooped up inside the fort.
Mosquito Swarm: Thirsty!

Three basic possibilities: roll unmodified, roll with a bonus/penalty, or instant attack. These modifiers could be likened to a 'slide' of the probability curve up or down. Note how they can drastically change results at the extremes, so keep that in mind.


Reaction Rolls based on Modifiers (%):

Modifier	Hostile	Unfriendly	Neutral	Indifferent	Friendly
-4	41.7	41.7	16.7	0	0
-3	27.8	44	25	2.8	0
-2	16.7	41.7	33.3	8.3	0
-1	8.3	33.3	41.7	16.7	0
0	2.8	25	44	25	2.8
+1	0	16.7	41.7	33.3	8.3
+2	0	8.3	33.3	41.7	16.7
+3	0	2.8	25	44	27.8
+4	0	0	16.7	41.7	41.7

Going beyond +/-2 obviously can only happen by combining extreme CHA scores and situational modifiers. I include them for completeness and info-tainment purposes. Be careful when that 18 CHA PC starts taking the lead!


Limits

Another possibility. Less extreme than +/- modifiers, more consistent results. Simply determine the best or worst possible reaction the creature might respond with. I would use this only in specific cases, as I think it's more fun to have a wide range of possibilities. For example:

Charau-Ka: Demon-worshipping ape-men. Disdain other humanoids, especially hairless ones. Best reaction is Neutral.

An encounter with the Charau-Ka has the same chance of being instantly hostile and a huge chance of being neutral (6-12). That charismatic paladin won't make friends with them, but has some chance of being able to defuse the situation without violence. This sets a limit to how well (or poorly) the encounter will go, while leaving some room for chance and stat modifiers to play their part. In a sense it is a halfway point between "instantly hostile" and a numerical modifier.


Quantum Reactions

A fun technique is to build other random determinations into your reaction roll. Look at this entry from my encounter tables:

Wildmen: Reaction roll for tribe
2: Wolf or Jackal. Hate everyone.
3-11: Any (1d6 - 1 Wolf, 2 Bear, 3 Caiman, 4 Bat, 5 Spider, 6 DM's choice)
12: Caiman. Welcoming to travellers, enjoy games & contests.

This combines the Limit technique with some baked-in detail about the game world. I am not 100% sure about this method yet, but it continues to work well for me in Land's End. The players don't know what the rolls do, it all happens behind the scenes. It just so happens that all the belligerent locals wear wolf pelts, and the friendly ones crocodile-skin masks. In the middle, anything can happen and relationships will be determined by player character actions and circumstance. This does mean that you can have "indifferent" reactions from the Wolf tribe and "unfriendly" reactions from the Caiman tribe. These groups are still people like everyone else. Ultimately this saves time and allows the DM to absorb setting information with one glance at the local encounter table.


More Suggestions

The possibilities are endless. I have not tried these yet, but they might work:

Motivations. I am considering this in a dungeon I'm working on right now, but care must be taken. If you have an array of interests or goals for a group of monsters and can't choose one, a reaction roll would be one way to decide. Eg: If the neanderthals want to make contact with the gnolls on level 2 and are also fighting with the goblins for control of the main corridors, perhaps the initial reaction roll sets the tenor for their attitudes throughout the dungeon delve: 2-5 indicates they are on war footing against the goblins and 9-12 suggesting diplomatic efforts towards the gnolls. Later on, other neanderthal parties will be in the midst of pursuing this same goal.

What are the monsters doing when you meet?
Hostile: patrolling territory, on a raid
Unfriendly: hiding loot, hunting, getting high on cave fungus
Neutral: guarding an area
Indifferent: trying to sleep, absorbed in a game,
Friendly: recovering from another fight, selling something, on a religious holiday

What condition are they in? A 'friendly' result might mean they're wounded or low on manpower, willing to bargain. A 'hostile' group is at full strength and ready to throw down. Modify the # encountered by 10-20% depending on the reaction roll.

Let's hear suggestions in the comments, or maybe some links to other folks that have discussed this!


***** Campaign Update *****


It had to happen: the Land's End game is going to slow right down since my brother just had his daughter. Cigars all around folks, I'm an uncle now!

As a rules-heavy, character-driven sandbox with only three players, it will be tough to play without him. My brother is one of the best players I've ever DM'd for, and his serpent oracle Vuk Thuul seems to drive the campaign along just by showing up. Luckily the drop-in game is taking off, new people keep showing up and we're having great fun.

There are still plenty of articles in my 'Drafts' folder about Land's End, including the last dungeon they explored but I'm going to be shifting my focus to the other side of the campaign world and the escapades of a brand-new group of 1st level scrubs trying to survive all my LotFP adventures and the encounters from The Nocturnal Table!

Pursuant to this, YOU dear readers can expect more of:

-Play reports on various OSR modules as I run my players through them. I don't like "standard narrative play reports" but I am writing them up for my players anyway, so you'll get something between a review and a play report - what went wrong, what the players liked, what was easy to use, what was difficult, what I'd do differently next time.

-Making the Wilderlands my own, likely by borrowing more from Book of the New Sun

-Nameless Cults and Gifts of Chaos

-The return of Fun on the Velvet Horizon

-More demon-summoning rules

-New Labyrinth Lord rules and less pathfinder content!


Next week we're back with High Medieval weapons & armour.

The Drowning Dead

ACHTUNG: This post is actually pretty grim and contains descriptions of real-world torture & executions, be warned!

*****

Well shit. I owe Joesky more back-taxes than I owe the government by now! Let's get into something useful, some fun undead varieties from Land's End.

The Drowned Lands at the center of my Land's End hexmap is the locus of the setting. It's home to the lizardfolk, one of the few non-chaotic humanoid groups. One of the PCs is a lizardman so relations should start cordially - leading to plenty of roleplaying opportunities and adventure hooks. Most of the ancient cities and monoliths of the elder races lie in the swamps, for reasons unknown.

I'm excited about next session: my PCs are about to delve into the great swamp in search of Aercius' lost holy symbol, still held by his arm which was ripped off by a horde of zombies years ago! Of course it's a viciously dangerous region, so we'll see how much time the PCs spend there. The undead hordes make it especially difficult:


The Dead Legion

When the Empire of Man held (nominal) control over the wilderness beyond the Barrier, they stationed hundreds of soldiers to control the humanoid swamp-dwellers and guard the valuable resources they attempted to exploit. As Imperial might waned, the locals reclaimed what was theirs. One particular revolutionary slaughter destroyed an entire Imperial legion, leaving a literal mountain of corpses heaving out of the swamp. Over the years the site has been avoided by the locals, who so hated the invaders it was decided they weren't even worth eating.

Now the island stirs with vile unlife. A wriggling mass of slime-covered bones reaches out of the swamp, and some of these bones crawl, swim and walk away to pursue the Dead Legion's unknown purpose. What force animates these long-dead soldiers, and why now?

Of course it's all the clergy of Orcus' fault. Their activity in the Tomb of Abysthor to the south, digging in the great and ancient pit of bones, has emboldened them. One of their more puissant clerics has built a small house on the island of bodies and digs underneath through the rotting mound, for purposes unknown.

The only swamp faction that has to deal with the Legion is the bog elves. The island reaches down into their shadowed mirror-world beneath the waters of the swamp. Hanging upside-down above them in the black like a pale, rotting white sun. They hate it. Sometimes a few Legionnaires drop off and fall into their shadowy kingdom to cause death and mayhem - the elves fear what might occur should the island be destroyed or broken up completely.


[Dead Legion: Stats as normal skeletons. Slimy bones make them difficult to grapple (-4 penalty). Rusting weapons (-1 dmg) break on an attack roll of 1 or 20. Depending on the unit, they will have light or medium armour. I'm using chain shirts or breastplates (50% chance of each). All armour is rusted to hell (-2 AC). Dead Legionnaires speak a mix of Skeletongue and Imperial Common.]

Adapted from the Dyson Logos classic 'Challenge of the Frog Idol,' which you can get for free HERE.

Rebels & Sacrifices

The lizardfolk were the worst hit by the old Imperial occupation. A proud and violent warrior culture does not bend to the yoke easily. In those days, the empire had ruthless methods of putting down rebels and "traitors." Their public executions were legendary, and included the swift "Dozen Swords" and the slow, torturous Leng Tch'e: death by a thousand cuts. Many lizardfolk braves suffered these torments, which still loom large in their imagination hundreds of years later.

The tsathar and crabmen were just killed - too chaotic or stupid to be made use of anyway. All these corpses were just dumped in the rivers and ponds of the drowned lands.

In the distant past, when every humanoid race was in thrall to the gods of Chaos, even the proud lizardfolk conducted sacrifices to appease those ancient demon lords. Strangulation, drowning, impalement or worse were all pronounced by the high priests. They turned from that path ages ago, but the swamp remembers. The bodies of those sacrificed to propitiate the demon lords litter the drowned lands, and sometimes they wake up...


[Lizardfolk Zombie: Stats as normal zombies but great lizard-strength gives them +1 to damage. If you're playing Pathfinder, I guess you're stuck using templates like me. Those zombies who died at Imperial hands speak their normal language, while sacrificial victims of the old ways may speak Draconic or even Hissing if they're truly ancient.]

They differ by method of execution, roll for each individually (d6):

1 - Strangulation: Neck is bent at a disconcerting angle, head may be fixed or flop about sickeningly. The head can be damaged or even destroyed without affecting the zombie's HP total.

2 - Bamboo Impalement: Tied down over new bamboo shoots, which can grow 4cm in an hour, slowly impaling the body. The assortment of bamboo spikes in the corpse can be thrown like small javelins (1d6), or the zombie can attempt a spiky bearhug (2d6 on a successful grapple, 1d6 to an attacker who attempts a grapple).

3 - Leng Tch'e: The eyes, ears, nose, tail and organs of generation have been cut off, to say nothing of strips of flesh all over the body. Perpetually oozing blood from numberless wounds. No special abilities - they're just horrifying.

4 - Swamp Drowning: Mud poured down its throat and sunk to the bottom of the swamp. It will attempt to grapple and pin an enemy, and drown them by coughing & vomiting a perpetual flow of river mud into their mouths. Use your system's drowning rules, or say 1d8 damage and -1 CON per attack.

5 - Fed to Crabs: A horde of small yellow & green swamp-crabs live in the zombie's abdomen. I'm going to use a half-HD version of Pathfinder's "Crab Swarm" monster (I suppose there are SOME useful things about the system). Simply put, take 1d6 damage every round you stand within 5' of the zombie.

6 - Dozen Swords: Impaled by 2d6 rusting imperial swords right through its body. Just like the Man of Wounds from Varlets & Vermin. Its hit points/HD are equal to the damage rolled by all the swords stuck into it. Striking it causes your weapon to stick, and adds hit points equal to the weapon's damage. Damage it by removing a weapon from its body. When all weapons are gone, it's dead.


*****

Phew, that was a good one! Lots of cool shit coming up soon, let's keep it rocking:

Sage's Report 1 - The Jaguar-Headed Idol

Last session, Vuk Thuul the snake oracle saved up enough money (2000 silver) to pay the sage Vantadel for his first question. The wild half-elf wanted to know the origins of his savage cannibal tribe and the mysterious idol they worshipped - a crude statue of a man with a jaguar's head. This is what I sent the player:

*****

"Much ink has been spilled over the antediluvian fall of the elven race. To your situation, very little pertains anymore. It is enough to know that your tribes have occupied their lowly estate for generations upon generations, scrabbling to survive at the edge of the world.

The human side of your lineage is anyone's guess. Mayhap one of your ancestors was captured in a raid, or was an outcast from Imperial society. Regardless, I wager all your kind are of similar mixed blood these many years.

As for your specific tribe I have no answers. You speak of cannibalism and sacrificial midnight rites - things the long-fallen are not known for. They raid and fight, especially amongst themselves, but keep to their old ways where they know how. I glimpse the taint of Chaos in this news, and I fear for your own future and that of your friends.

You know the world warms with every passing year. Rivers run high with snowmelt and crops wither beneath the sun. I am older than you by far. I remember a different age when each season kept to its own quarter of the year, not overstepping its allotted time.

Even then, some parts of the world were hotter. In the distant south beyond the reach of the Imperium, beyond your ancestral hunting grounds in the badlands, a hot and misty jungle lies. The cloud forests you visited beyond the eastern Barrier resemble the scattered reports we have of this southern land. Men lived there who bowed not to Seheitt nor any other emperor. Wild and free, as the long-fallen are, they owned only what they could take with their own hands.

Few things these men feared. Only one could be understood by our expeditions. We have no word in our language, in theirs it is forvalaka. Beasts of the jungle that stalk men with human intelligence. So fast and strong that they could pounce upon a hunting party and tear them to pieces in seconds. Impervious to weapons. Impossible to kill. Feared by all.

Animals, spirits, or demons? Their exact nature wasn't understood. Some described insubstantial ghosts, who became solid only to attack. Others said they live in the water, or in the trees. The only coherent reports we have describe them as mighty black hunting cats who stalk the jungle on all fours, but can walk upright like men.

I believe this is what your tribe's idol depicts.

The southern jungle-men said the entire evil race was destroyed by a great magic, cast by their shamans and sorcerers. Although the nature of this spell is unclear, their language seems to indicate a bane or curse was laid on the monsters since direct attacks were near useless.

How this idol left the jungle, crossed the badlands and came into the hands of your people, I cannot say. I fear its arrival cannot be coincidental. Old forces may be stirring, wakened by the return of hospitable climes and brought on the hot southern winds to our quiet homeland.

Yours,
-Nicomaeus Vantadel IV, esq.

PS: I must apologize for the vagueness of these reports - our information on the southern lands is limited by the language barrier attendant on all contacts with this distant culture and the rarity of expeditions returning home."

*****



These hew fairly close to the ones from the Black Company. Sorry/not sorry. If more people cribbed from those books, it would be a badass-er world. Of course, the idol that Vuk Thuul's elf tribe worshipped is one of the last forvalaka, turned to stone by magic. Maybe it became un-petrified and ate his whole tribe? Maybe it's coming after him now? I haven't decided yet, but... probably.


[Stats will be similar to the Jaguar from the Tome of Horrors, but tougher, more HD and a bit magically-enhanced. Lycanthrope "templates" in Pathfinder are fucking annoying, I want a monster I can use right out of the book. They need AC enough that a veteran soldier has little chance to hit. Strong and accurate enough to kill a plate-armored man with one claw, fast enough to kill more than one man in a round. Magically protected enough or with enough hit points that humans with standard weapons have a bitch of a time killing one, even in large numbers. I'll post the stats up later when I finalize and playtest them.]

Get on your motorcycle and crank this up!!!

Play Report: Return to Land's End - Sessions 3 & 4

CAST OF CHARACTERS:

Vuk Thuul - level 1 half-elf snake oracle

Leliana Vess - level 1 sylph witch

Nahash - level 1 lizardman barbarian

*****

A Big Score

When we left our adventurous trio, they were in the goblins' basement treasure room digging through all the cool stuff they had found.

Nahash used his cheap 50' rope to strap the two treasure chests to his back. Throwing the last of their hacked-apart neanderthal corpses outside the room distracted the two surviving anemone men enough for the PCs to escape the basement. Imagining themselves safe, they barred the door and rested for the night to recover spells and a few hit points. At this point the wildmen leader snuck into the inn in the dead of night seeking revenge.

Nahash heard something, and crept upstairs to investigate. Unfortunately lizardmen don't have darkvision, so when he saw a pale shape moving in the darkness and lunged with his spear, he succeeded only in crashing into a pile of furniture and waking up the other PCs. Lucky for him, since the wildmen leader's greatclub smote him fiercely for 12 points of damage, leaving the seemingly-indestructible 15-hp barbarian close to a KO. Leliana woke up, ran into the mix and one sleep hex later, Vuk Thuul knifed his ass and everyone went back to bed.

The next day the PCs headed back home with the treasure. [The wandering monster tables were quite lenient these two sessions, and I wonder if I should step them up even more, but that's a subject for another post]. They scrambled back up the cliff and arrived, muddy and bleeding, back in Land's End. The first order was paying the sage Vantadel to house Nahash away from the prying eyes of the villagers (nobody likes foreigners, especially not 6-foot talking lizards with spears).

After all the gold, silver, trinkets and art objects were tallied up the crew had raked in about 5400 silver, and almost 6000 XP!! Vuk Thuul used most of his share paying the sage for research projects. The other PCs bought new clothes, backpacks, adventuring gear and a few better weapons.

[I am using a silver standard, but the costs in gold listed in the Pathfinder book - so everything is 10 times the price it normally would be. They had to pull in this big score just to get some 'standard-grade' items instead of rope that's falling apart, weapons that break, etc.]


Return to the Inn: Exploration and Revelations




Deciding to push their fucking luck in a serious way, the party returned to get paid by the goblins who first gave them the job. You know, the job where they swiped all the goblins' treasure they could carry?

After burying their visible loot (Nahash's bone sword, etc) they returned to the goblins' ruined fort and showed them some wildmen scalps. Sgt. Horgh gave them their bounty of silver and offered a new job: go north to the goblins' caves near the quarry, and find out why nothing's been heard from them for weeks. They elected to rest up in the fort and spent some of their night trying out the strange magical torches they... erh... looted from the goblins' treasure room. [I don't think any of the players realized what they were doing. When those turn up missing, someone might remember those adventurers...]

Instead of going north, the team returned to the goblins' inn and climb down the well they meant to check out before. Turns out it opened into an old cave system underneath! The wildmen had wrecked everything, and fled with some goblin prisoners. Those they didn't eat, kill or enslave were a few goblin children and some wounded adults in a cage. They spoke common (these goblins are a pretty well-educated bunch. I wonder why?) and were a bit helpful, especially when the PCs released them and Leliana healed everyone with a hex [the witch is a resource monster - those hexes never run out. Jesus Christ].

Delving deeper, they passed through a deep flooded cave and into the goblins' underground base, originally built by the dwarves in ages past. The place was ransacked, corpses of goblin and neanderthals everywhere. The wildmen had fled with the valuables, except a few boxes of palm-sized heavy brass coins stamped with outlandish faces and creatures. The party took a few as the full crates were far too heavy to carry.

One barred door opened into a tiny foul-smelling room. A great crude stone idol of a hideous toad squatted on a defaced altar to the dwarven gods. Ritual implements, knives and tools littered the room. In the center, a great basin filled with slime, covered in moss and mold, emanated a deathly odor. The party poked into it with a stick, which promptly dissolved and they decided to leave it a lone. Leliana did find a wickedly curved ritual knife (normal dagger stats, but a well-made metal weapon is still a precious commodity at this point in the game!). Nahash pried the smooth yellow-green gemstone eyes out of the frog statue.

[I know I put them there, and it was kind of obvious, but my heart still filled with joy when he pried those eyes out with the other two holding a blanket so they wouldn't fall into the vat of slime.]

Another room had goblin-sized fortifications in it - facing inwards. In the center was a shaft going straight down, with climbing gear, anchors for ropes and travelling equipment everywhere. When Vuk Thuul cast light on a pebble and dropped it in, I played him this video:

They elected not to climb down. [Smart.]

The last door in the complex had debris and furniture piled haphazardly in front of it. Clearing it away and sticking his head through the door, Nahash was greeted warmly.

"Come in," a deep and sinister voice purred. "I've been waiting for more visitors..."

The voice belonged to an eight-foot tall, fire engine-red talking slug with a smug grin. ABSALOM GLOP was trapped inside a glowing circle of salt on the floor. Leliana's arcane knowledge identified it as a Magic Circle against Law. Curious...

Absalom explained that it had been summoned from deep underground by the white goblin priest Guzboch and trapped inside the magic circle. It was desperate to be freed. This led to some hard bargaining. Absalom explained its (currently very weak) Lawful aura prevented the PCs from stealing any goblin property or taking any of their stolen loot out of the room. [Remember when they signed a mercenary contract with Guzboch back in session 1? I was planning for this.] If the circle were broken, it could leave and they'd be free to take anything they desired.

Vuk Thuul struck a deal. Absalom swore to wage no aggression against the party for one month, answer three serious questions and one personal inquiry. Vuk Thuul asked about these things:

1 - What do you know of the ancient god called VORN, who sleeps beneath the Dreaming Mountain?

2 - Do you know anything about these carved ivory plates we found?

3 - Tell us about the petrified forest?

Absalom answered these as its knowledge allowed, expounding on these topics long into the night. It lived deep in the earth, and has travelled far, even visiting the surface sometimes. It is is old - personally remembering the rise of Vorn's priesthood a thousand years ago, and relating some facts about that time. Of the ivory plates it could say little except they were of high elven make, thousands of years old. The stone forest was created during the cataclysmic fall of that same ancient race, when their magic ran amok and nearly destroyed the world.

4 - For his last question, Vuk Thuul pulled down his ragged bandanna to reveal the mysterious brand that mars his face and neck: two serpents coming down his chin and curving around his jaw to whisper in his ears.

Absalom was intrigued by this development, leaning in close to Vuk Thuul's face and murmuring to itself about "definitely being on the lists." It could only relate a tale of a tattooed man it had met once, who hailed from a place called Scrivenbough and named his master - ABRAXAS.

His questions answered, Vuk Thuul scratched the salt circle. Absalom was out of the room in a flash leaving only a trail of slime, diving into the cistern in the cave outside and swimming downward into the darkness out of sight.

*****

[The day after this session I realized I had forgotten to describe a series of adventure hooks in the form of the goblins' intelligence reports piled in a closet the PCs had searched. I posted them up in our 'scheduling a game' group chat. I reproduce it here so it won't get lost, and because I feel pretty good about it.]

"When you were searching the cabinets for treasure after Absalom left, there was a 'booklet' of papers bound together with string, and some loose pages scattered on top. None are magical. The booklet is written with Imperial characters, in a language or code none of you recognize. The loose papers are scratched out in Imperial Common and each one is a brief report on some subject of interest to the goblins. All written in different scribbly handwriting, they read as follows:

1 - 'Black robes a few days south in jungles. Look like pinks, maybe. Tall bone-walkers too. All of them hunting for something.'

2 - 'Tall, tall white buildings in the jungle southeast. Scouts afraid.'

3 - 'Tall green lizards more fighty for months. More with the red paint come out of the swamp into our territory. Yellow-eyes down the river too hard to fight.'

4 - 'North along the river past the fork. Stone building is covered in trees. Big snake carvings. Lots of dead black-robes around. Smells bad!'

5 - 'The rock pit by the cliffs is dangerous. A few scouts and guards have disappeared. Why do we have to build a new fort anyway?'

6 - The last piece of paper is a series of scribbles and scratches, done in charcoal. Some notes underneath in a different, more practise handwriting say: 'Stone under the inn. Bears further study.'"


The next day my brother said "Oh snap. This is better than Elder Scrolls."

Feels pretty good!!!

Mathfinder is on the ropes!!

Inspired by this, let's collect all the hacks, chops, floggings and punches I've delivered to the otherwise bloated body of Pathfinder. 


*****


SKILLS:


Some skills are useful, plenty are garbage. I cut maybe 1/3 of the skills and simplified others. Basically I'm following the example set by Hack and Slash and Papers & Pencils.


I cut PF's base skill points awarded by class in half. There are fewer skills to spend points on, so characters should have commensurately less points to spend.

ELIMINATE:

Appraise: What a waste of time.

Disable Device: Have you MET me??

Disguise, Intimidate, Bluff: Rolling to avoid the fun.

Sense Motive: Look into my eye and figure it out.

Escape Artist: There is already a sleight of hand skill!

Fly: Casting the Fly spell isn't enough...?

MODIFY:

Diplomacy: Now a passive skill called “Sociable.” I use the reaction rules from Labyrinth Lord, and the CHA modifiers listed there. You can't spend points in this except to offset CHA penalties, up to +0.

Linguistics: Doesn't teach you a brand-new language with each point. If you want to learn a new language, find somebody to teach it to you. Make a roll to understand bits & pieces of languages related to ones you know. Spend points on it as normal.

Profession: Maximum 1 point at 1st level. This is your background (villager, woodsman, carpenter, etc). Could be useful for general questions relating to that background, but maybe take knowledge or crafting skills if you want to do more useful things.

Perception: Passive skill. I'll roll it for you (do you see people sneaking up on you?). Discover things in the world by poking around and asking questions.

Spellcraft: Many magic items’ general purpose is identifiable by a character of the relevant class after 10 minutes of examination. In Epic 6 this hinges on the item's caster level - if it's above CL 6, it's beyond mortal beings, more or less an artifact. These will require research, questing, consulting sages, etc. to identify.

The other functions of the skill we can keep for now - recognising spells as they're cast, crafting magic items and the like.

Swim:

-1 or less: can’t swim

0: can avoid drowning, paddle along with help

+1 or more: fine swimmer

Climb:

-1 or less: climb at ¼ speed with help (friends and gear)

0: climb at ¼ speed OR climb at ½ speed with help

+1 or more: climb at ½ speed

Armour check penalties still apply. Can spend extra points to offset penalties, but no mechanical effect beyond +1.


LEAVE AS IS:

Acrobatics, Craft, Handle Animal, Heal, Perform, Ride, Sleight of Hand, Stealth, Use Magic Device: Nothing wrong with these as far as I can tell.

Knowledge: Has utility in my setting for dealing with strange monsters beyond the Barrier. Maybe you read something in an old book about this little green guy you just met?

Survival: Huge in a wilderness hexcrawl that's totally uncharted by civilization! The PCs need this to find food and water and avoid getting hopelessly lost. 

*****

FEATS: Cutting out feats altogether for a more 'old-school' feel runs counter to the entire point of Epic 6. I will be approaching this ad-hoc, and deleting feats that seem pointless or dumb case-by-case. Some 'epic feats' need to be added later if/when the PCs reach 6th level.

Item creation may get its own post, I am going to make it a more involved process: magic items should be rare and hard to find, doubly hard to make yourself. Selecting the feat is only the first of many steps.

ENCUMBRANCE: Why mess with it? You can carry one significant item per point of strength. The sum of all your miscellaneous stuff counts as one significant item (subject to eyeballing if you have lots of stuff). medium armour counts as two items, heavy armour counts as three, same goes for shields.

Example: A totally average fighter with 10 STR can wear plate mail [3], a tower shield [3], a sword [1], and bring a bag with some food and stuff [1] without being encumbered [8/10]. If he wanted to carry a lot of treasure out of the dungeon he might have to leave his shield or downgrade his armour. As it is, he should probably content himself with bringing a spare weapon or two!


This seems pretty fair to me, and reminds me a bit of Dark Souls. When your inventory system is simple enough, you can actually MAKE DECISIONS about what to bring, because the units are small enough to think about.

EXPERIENCE: Multiple ways to gain XP: exploration, treasure and defeating monsters.
COMBAT: Simplified and streamlined where possible. Attacks of Opportunity are minimised except in specific cases (a wizard getting hit while he tries to cast). This is one place I haven't dug too deep, mainly because my players don't know the rules that well. I just run combats the way I'm used to doing, and it seems to work out alright. As they gain levels and things get a bit more complex, this will require more attention.


MONSTERS: I flat-out fucking refuse to write up brand new monster stats for this game. I have shit to do. This isn't really tough since the Tome of Horrors and other books abound, except that nobody has written up Pathfinder stats for Fire on the Velvet Horizon. I have yet to reach a solution for this. I suppose I must poach and reskin stats from existing monsters as I see fit.


*****


I'll add more to this as I come up with it or find cool links. Eventually PF will be easier to use, less annoying and make more sense, but retain the absurd variety of options that makes it so much fun. 

In the meantime: 

DIE.