Middenmurk weapon & armour rules AKA Standing on the Shoulders of Giants

So I started using Middenmurk's weapon and armour rules (in case you've been living under a fucking rock, read both of those NOW), because that shit is the bomb. In practise there were a few hiccups, I totally forgot about a lot of the special characteristics in the fracas of melee. The PCs certainly weren't about to remind me that "my guy hits last every round 'cause of his crappy weapon". I definitely need to improve the implementation, but I'll share my thoughts.

Middenmurk has it right. A wider spectrum of equipment is a great idea - instead of having the best weapon and the 2nd-best armour right at first level and having nowhere to go but magic items, you get to start with garbage gear and work up to amazing shit, without going up the "plusses treadmill." This means magic items can be way less common - just the way I like it!

In the spirit of the Peasant Equipment List, here is my first kick at the can:
All prices use the copper piece, same as Middenmurk, cause it rules.

PEASANT ARMOUR LIST
(yeah I use ascending AC, so what?)

Unarmored: AC 11
Buff Jerkin: sleeveless cow leather jacket - AC 12, fragile, 20 cp
Bark Bands: wooden rods bound together into a jacket - AC 13, stiff, awkward, 30 cp

Swineskin: heavy cured boar-leather coat. AC 13, pork, fragile, 45 cp
Cornwall Brinejack: cured fish skin cuirass, looks cool - AC 13, fragile, fish, slippery, 55 cp
Penny-plate: tiny copper disks laced to a cloth backing - AC 15, fragile, jingles, 100 cp

Wicker Shield: small wooden hoop with wicker woven over it - +1 AC, fragile, 25 cp
Plank Shield: wood hacked into round shape - +1 AC, fragile, clunky, 20 cp
Padded Cap: covers the head & ears - fragile, 10 cp

ARMOUR CHARACTERISTICS

fragile: damaged (-1 AC) if enemy rolls a 20 - if AC bonus is eliminated, it’s wrecked
stiff: no DEX bonus to AC
slippery: difficult to grapple or be grappled while wearing
awkward: takes longer to take on/off, cannot sleep while wearing
jingles: makes noise, harder to sneak while wearing
pork: smells delicious
fish: stinks
clunky: only protects vs 1 attack per round

Next I gotta expand outwards with tons of different racial, tribal, and other equipment lists. First up will be the 'wildman weapon/armour list' for a few PCs who are from outside the empire and just use sharpened sticks. After that, we'll have lizardman stone & bone weapons (I imagine them being sort of ancient mayan, so they'll use those clubs with obsidian blades in them), the bog elves' greenish swamp-iron, crappy goblin gear, ancient elven & dwarven stuff from the lost kingdoms (need some effort to keep those from being boring), the charred and rusted tools of the gloom farmers and a ton more!